Amazing Race

First story:
Due to a wonderful mother-in-law we've recently acquired the first 4 episodes of this season's Amazing Race. Woohoo!! Well, we watched them all the other day and thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. If you are up in this season's AR you know that the first episode took place in Beijing. It was so exciting for us to think about a bunch of American's rushing around Beijing, eating fish eyes, and raiding Tiananmen Square. You also should know about some of the competitors, (or should we say "characters") on this season. There are the token frat boys, the cheerleaders, & the couple "struggling" to stay together, but this season there are a couple in there who we think highly entertaining. There are two black girls who speak ebonically perfect and a married couple who...let's just say they must come from the deep south of Kentucky. Up until today they were our votes for "who should be eliminated next." (I'll explain in a moment)
Second story:
Tonight one of our best chinese friends came over for a visit. He's an english teacher so we usually speak english to him. Tonight though we thought we'd practice some of our chinese on him so he could help us with pronunciation. (This being the same guy whose in-laws can't understand him because they speak a different dialect. Let me also interject...those in-laws only live about 2 hours away.) After we discovered that we didn't stand a chance of understanding him, we transitioned into us helping him with his english pronunciation. After getting bored with going through the entire alphabet, practicing saying America instead of Americ, we got a new idea.
Merge two stories:
Why not introduce him to ebonics, hicks, & airheads all in one simple episode of Amazing Race?!We popped in the newly acquired AR DVD and fast forwarded to the parts featuring the couple from Kentucky saying "I ain't never been to China", the cheerleaders saying "like", the frat boys saying "dude!", and the black girls saying "oh, nuh uh, she not gonna do dat." Before you jump all over us for being stereotypical, examine the beauty of educating some of China's finest on the multi-faceted language that English is. ALL IN ONE EPISODE!! He thought it was hilarious that only the hicks had English subtitles explaining to other English speakers what they were saying. Of course he couldn't follow along quite as quickly as most of the people were talking, and couldn't read the English subtitles as quickly as they were flashing up there for the hicks, but he sure enjoyed watching all of them use two hands (one hand per chopstick) to eat the fish eyes. And even more so when all of them butchered the pronunciation of Xie Xie (thank you.) So thanks mother-in-law for not only being a our provider in time of AR need, but for providing some educational resources as well.
This is him trying to make sense of it all:

a BIG thanks to my mom & dad for providing the BIG HUNKS laying on the coffee table.