Professional 'B' Teamer

After braving this post, we've had lots of people say stuff like this to us:
"You're so brave. I don't think I could live in Asia."
             or
"What you're doing is amazing."
             or
"I'm so proud of what you guys are doing."
                etc.....etc.......etc.........

So I thought I'd go ahead and clear things up for you.

In reality, I'm a professional B teamer.  I was the kid in 8th grade math class that took the opportunity to be paired with the dorky smart kid so that I wouldn't have to work as hard.  I once literally jumped the gun in a 300 meter hurdle race so that I wouldn't actually have to run the race. (between you and me though, who really wants to run that race?!)
That's me, the one that would rather get out of doing the hard stuff.  Me and the-easy-way-out are best friends.

And so when I was in 5th grade or so and my younger sister informed my family one Sunday evening that she felt "called" to move overseas, it was just like me to say, "You're nuts. ugh....Good luck with that."   That was my 'B' teamer showing right on through.

Ironically though, God has a history of calling the disobedient and selfish 'B' teamers to do some hard stuff. And hard stuff for me includes leaving my parents and siblings. Saying goodbye to a "Target" lifestyle and drive thru windows. And embracing a new language, culture, people group, and country.

I wish I could say that I felt a specific call to move overseas. I wish I could say that I saw "China" spelled out in mustard on my cheeseburger several years ago. That would have been so cool.

But for me it's never been about a certain call or a huge answer to a specific prayer. It's always just been more of a "why not?" for me. And for the first time in my life as a professional 'B' teamer, I couldn't come up with any excuses.  I mean, I can come up with excuses, just not any that are good enough to say to God who has commanded us to go to the nations, to help the oppressed, to take care of the orphans.

No, it's not me that's brave.
I'm the one afraid of being gawked at in a different culture.
of fumbling through Chinese.
of Chinese doctors not being able to adequately care for my children.
of unbearably missing my family.
of homeschooling, chinese food, and not being able to buy shoes in my size. (yes, I'm a weirdo.)

I'm the one with these fears.

Fortunately, God does not give me a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control. And while every ounce of my 'B' teamness wants to shine through and say, "No thanks God. I'm perfectly content sittin' on the bench for this one,"  He continues to be my strength when I'm weak and help me to say "Yes!" every step of the way.

It's not me that is brave. I'm quite the opposite.
It's not me doing something amazing.
It's not me you should be proud of.    For real.

It's God who is amazing. It's God doing something awesome. And it's God whose grace is sufficient and whose power is made perfect in my 'B' teamer weakness.